Burning Ones

I don’t understand why I said it, or whether I felt it or not, but the words, “It was nice seeing you” slipped out of my mouth upon saying good bye to someone. I realized what I was saying about half-way through and I was so shocked that I almost stopped mid-sentence altogether and had to force “you” out, stuttering all the way- it turned out to be a very awkward parting.

But what shocked me so much was that fact that I had no control over it. I mean, was it nice seeing them? I mean, sure, but not really. They’re more neutral to me and although I would never say to myself, “ugh, I’ll have to see this person,” I’m certainly not “yay! It’ll be nice seeing them!” So why did I say it?

I realize I say it a lot (and probably loads of over things I don’t mean) under the guise of being polite. Hm. Even when I don’t feel them. And, even though someone could argue it’s always good to be polite, I really don’t want to be that kind of person. I’m not saying I should tell them my right mind about them. The goal would be to love them and then respond out of that love, but I certainly don’t want to end up lying. Oh, well. Will have to work and pray about this.

Any thoughts?

You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.